What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

What is the most sentimental item you inherited from someone dear to you and what does it mean to you?

Make Nazis afraid again!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

How do empaths destroy narcissists?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Which country has the best and strictest legal system in the world?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

What are the most common signs that a partner will cheat before it happens?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

I’m 17 and looking for a girl. What do I do?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

What were some things that the ancient Greeks excelled at compared to the Romans?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

What have I done wrong? How can I start over?

TEXT:

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Why do some women alter their faces by so-called cosmetic surgeries (on their eyes, cheeks, lips, chin, jaw) that making them look like Donald Duck or puffy aliens, while for most men these unnatural facial changes are ridiculous or even disgusting?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

As a teacher, what's the most inappropriate experience you've had with a student?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

What are the bitter truths of life one should know?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

President Trump kicked Zelensky out of the White House. Is it over for a deal?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.